Tuesday, January 6, 2009

On being single, and all that.

I have spent the majority of my Second Life single, though there have been three gentlemen that I have called beaus. Each of them left a mark on my heart in some way (good and bad), and there are no regrets.

I don't mind being single, I get a lot more work done that way, and I'm free to dance with who I please at balls. As it happens, I find myself single again as of yesterday, which means that (a) I can go dance with whomever I please (though I could anyways) and (b) I'm getting some work done.

The conclusion of the last relationship was very amicable, and even warm, if one can describe the severance of romance as such. But sometimes people are better off as friends, particularly when their needs are markedly different. I initiated it, and though I grieved a little bit, I am not unhappy with the outcome, particularly as we are getting along better now, or so it seems.

I also get something whenever a relationship ends, and that is a longer list of What I Do Not Want. The list began ages ago, and I add to it as needed as my own needs change.

So far, it reads as follows:

I do not want...

- someone who wants to be my master. Good luck.
- someone who wants to be my slave.
- polyamory.
- a control freak.
- SL relationships that form only with the intent of having them go RL.
- bad sex that relies heavily on poseballs. Descriptive posts are hot.
- n00b peeners/unrealisitically big peeners/badly coloured peeners.
- someone who wants to corral me. I'm a kitty, not a horse.
- someone who doesn't spend time doing stuff with me.
- a coward.
- a smooth talker.
- someone who takes all my time.
- someone who runs away if they know my secrets.
- someone who uses sex and affection as weapons.
- someone who doesn't care.
- someone who mangles English and/or is apparently on SL from their phone.

The list goes on. There's a point, though, where it's obvious (ie, no liars, no nutbars, etc), or where it seems like I'm being too picky, so I elected to leave those off.

What do I like?

I like:

- affection.
- doing things with a special someone.
- good sex. Yes.
- brains!
- intelligent conversation.
- someone who is not afraid to argue with me when I'm soapboxing.
- gentlemen.
- some ladies, but they rarely catch my attention In That Way.
- anatomically correct bodies.
- humour.
- attractive avatars. Shallow? Perhaps.
- being special to someone.
- someone who understands Reg.
- being the One and Only.
- someone who understands me.

So ... now what? Do I embrace my new single status, though I never really felt like I was 'taken'? Or do I keep myself open to the possibilities of someone else coming into my oh-so-busy Second Life?

I think I like the latter idea.

If I could take the best qualities of the three gentlemen I was involved with, I'd create a gentleman of my own. Wait...Reg?



Too bad I never see him.

1 comment:

Capt. Red Llewellyn said...

Oh my stars and garters my dear darling Reghan! [grins] how funny i find myself in the *same* situation at the moment! and with almost the *same* list! and the ending outcome was the same warm amicable parting.... i know i just hit you with a quick chat tonight but we must sit down and compare notes later..[grins] and lists! XOXO [hugs you]
adore you, mean it! heck, maybe we should get together! [winks]
~Capt. Red